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  • Writer's pictureJessica Schaffer

How a Sugar Cookie Changed a Person's Life & Inspired a Thinking of You Holiday Card

Updated: Apr 2

Plate of cookies that say "love" and "tenderness"  "I know the holidays can be hard. I'm sending you some love & tenderness..

This was the first holiday card I ever designed recognizing how hard the holidays can be for so many people and understanding how under-represented that experience is in our dominant culture and social frameworks. It was actually inspired by a real life experience I had where a simple sugar cookie I gifted someone changed a man's life.

I was in my early 20s working as a server in a restaurant, and I was waiting on a table of three friends, one of whom was visibly upset. As they were wrapping up, I grabbed a dollar from my tip jar and purchased a sugar cookie from the checkout counter. When I dropped the check off to their table, I gave the cookie to this man and said, “It looks like you’re having a bad day. I thought maybe you’d appreciate a reminder that there is still some sweetness in the world.” And then they left.

A couple of hours later, one of the friends walked back into the restaurant with a bouquet of flowers. “A gift for you,” he said, “because that simple gesture of a sugar cookie changed my friend’s life today.”

Whether it’s a sugar cookie, or a card you send just because you are thinking of someone, the act of making space to reach out and let that person know that you see them and that you care, can never be underestimated. We don’t have to have fancy words. We don’t have to fix a problem, or make things better. We don’t even have to offer cheer. Just extending to someone reminds them that they matter and that they are not alone.

And that's what this thinking of you holiday card is all about! A prefect seasonal message to reach out with when the recipient:

  • is alone without a system of social support during this time of year

  • has had a recent loss of any kind and is facing the holidays while grieving

  • has a complicated history with the holidays or memories of difficult family dynamics

  • has suffered a trauma or otherwise impactful event during the holiday season in the past and now has an ambivalent relationship with those seasonal cues

  • does not celebrate the holidays in a "traditional" way

  • struggles with cultural and social expectations around the holiday season

  • Or for any other reason that might make the holidays hard!


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